Monday, May 29, 2006

A Day of Remembrance

Most of you have noticed my absence, and I thank you for the well wishes and emails. Y'all know it's bad if I don't post a Friday Funny ;) But there is something greater than my pain, and I can surely sacrifice a few moments on the computer...

As the daughter of a recently retired war vet (who lost four brave men in his platoon while deployed in Afghanistan one year ago) and granddaughter and niece and cousin and sister-in-law and friend of every branch of service in the U.S, it behooves me to memorialize the fallen this Memorial Day. No matter your opinion of the war or your political stance... millions of young (and old) brave men and women volunteered for a job I could never do. Millions volunteered to fight for MY freedoms. Millions said good-bye to their family and friends never to return home again. Millions will forever be remembered on this day and always for their courage and strength and honor and beliefs in freedom for one and all.

I have been blessed to have every soldier in my life return home. Though their bodies have returned, a part of them is gone forever. The memories... the images... the lives taken... those painful memories cannot be taken away or comforted. The memories of war will haunt them forever. The memories of saluting a fallen soldier's boots, rifle and helmet will never leave their thoughts. The feelings of guilt when they hug their loved ones knowing some families will never have that chance again. May they forever know our gratitude and feel pride and honor for all they have endured.

They shall grow not old
As we that are left grow old,
Age shall not weary them . .
Nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun,
And in the morning,
We will remember them!
-- Lawrence Binyon

I pray that our Heavenly Father
may assuage the anguish of your bereavement,
and leave you only the cherished memory of the
loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours,
to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the altar of Freedom.
-- Abraham Lincoln, November 1864

War drew us from our homeland
In the sunlit springtime of our youth.
Those who did not come back alive remain
in perpetual springtime -- forever young --
And a part of them is with us always.
-- Author Unknown

Do not stand by my grave and weep ... I am not there;
I do not sleep.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds
circling in flight.
Do not stand by my grave and cry ...
I am not there. I did not die.
-- Royster

Friday, May 19, 2006

Friday Funny!

(Two emails that crack me up!)

Never question a drunk...

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:

a half-gallon of 2% milk,
a carton of eggs,
a quart of orange juice,
a head of romaine lettuce,
a 2 lb. can of coffee and
a 1 lb. package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to
check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she
placed the items in front of the cashier. While the
cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly
stated, "You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but
she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since
she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on
the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about
her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to
her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well,
you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on
earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, " 'Cause you're ugly."

Gotta love drunk people...

A man, and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a
loudpounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a
drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3 o'clock in the morning!" He

slams the door and returns to bed.

"Who was that?" asked his wife.

"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.

"Did you help him?" she asks.

"No, I did not! It's 3 o'clock in the morning and it is pouring out there!"

"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!"

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"

"Yes," comes back the answer.

"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.

"Yes, Please!" comes the reply from the dark.

"Where are you?" asks the husband.

"Over here on the swing!" replies the drunk.


Thursday, May 18, 2006

Thirteen things that made me cry this week (in no particular order)...

1. Opening my Mother's Day gifts from my Jacob. All handmade and from the heart... and totally precious!

2. Listening to Taylor Hicks sing, "You Are So Beautiful". And Katharine McPhee sing, "Over The Rainbow". Okay. So it was an emotional evening.

3. Watching "Doc" being put to sleep on Dr. McDreamy and Crew.

4. Telling Daddy about a no kill shelter in New York. When a dog has to be put to sleep for medical reasons a lady takes the dog for a car ride to McDonalds for a chicken nuggets kids meal. Bluh. I'm bawling now!

5. Snickers' sad/sick eyes. I'm so afraid she's going to leave us. My heart can't take it. (Our dog)

6. Anon's comment on Vi's gossip site... but the comment wasn't about gossip. It was personal. Very hateful and hurtful. I can't stand people with self-esteem problems. Take that and put it in your low self-esteem pipe and smoke it!

7. An email power-point presentation about babies leaving heaven to live on earth and their angel will be called "Mommy".

8. Watching my baby grow up right in front of my eyes. He's less than a week away from being a 5th grader!

9. My insured package and the post office drama. It's been a month already. Yeah. I'm so close to going postal!

10. My baby brother calling me from work for Mother's Day! (He's single and the baby of the family... what's that tell ya?)

11. The $825 anesthesia bill I received on Saturday after insurance paid... adjusted to $36.70.

12. The $7,314.68 hospital bill I received on Tuesday after insurance paid... adjusted to $318.37.

13. The $2,618.29 neurosurgery bill I received on Wednesday afer insurance paid... adjusted to $686.48.
Total surgery cost (so far): $10, 757.97 Total due (so far): $1,041.55 I'll take it!

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Monday, May 15, 2006

Mother's Day Cards

Mother's Day was wonderful. Not because I felt well, but because I spent it with my family. My baby sister surprised me and came down for a few hours. (She's the sister that stayed with me after my surgery.) We chatted back and forth a little, but mainly just sat beside each other. Isn't that great? When it doesn't matter what you do or even say that makes a visit so wonderful? I love that. Don't get me wrong... I'd rather be talking. Anyone who knows me knows that. And I think you all know that by now ;)

My parents came over for dinner. They brought the food and everything. Again... isn't that the best! ;) My mom is looking so much better. She still wears out easily and can only eat small amounts, but she is looking so much better. Her hair is starting to fill out (where she lost a lot from malnutrition) as is her face. Her color is back to normal. Can't say she's gaining weight, but at least she's not losing it! She's looking great (have I mentioned that?). She is as beautiful as ever. Like I've always said... I can't wait to look like my mom!

Jacob was anxious to give me his Mother's Day gifts. They were awesome! I have to take pictures of them to share with you. All gifts were handmade. I'll share the rest of the story when I share the pictures. I'll say this now and repeat it later... Jacob is THE BEST son in the world! He has the biggest, most caring heart. It's so large his chest cannot contain it! And I am so blessed to have him in my life!!!!!!

The first card is obviously from Jacob. You should know he gets his art skills from me ;) Add the fact that he's a male and a lefty. The odds are stacked against him!

The drawing cracks me up!
I seriously thought it was a picture of me and the hairs on my chinny chin chin ;)

This card played, "What A Wonderful World," by Louis Armstrong.
He knows how much I love my Louis!
And let me just tell you... the boy picks out his own cards.
It's his thing. He's done it forever.
Before he could read he'd choose a card for the pictures and how they related to the person.
No joke. The boy's awesome!
I'm training him to become a wonderful, thoughtful husband. (You're welcome Chana!)

Obviously from my parents.
The inside is beautiful, but I wanted to share the outside.
I am so throwing that in my mom's face when she gives me that look of disappointment ;)

I hope you all had a wonderful Mother's Day. What would we be if it weren't for our kids? I won't allow myself the thought.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Happy Mother's Day

Before I was a Mom
I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Spit on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

BlogMad is celebrating Mother's Day by giving away credits to mom's who post their picture with their children. So here we are (the only two photos I have on the computer. and I'm way too lazy to upload more :p)... I'm a BlogMadMom

Kimmy and Jacob
Mother and Son
Mommy/Mom/Mama and Jacob Wacob
My baby and me...


To all my mom friends... this is for you. I wish you a Happy Mother's Day!

Friday, May 12, 2006

Friday Funny... Mother's Day Style!

Things I Learned From My Mother:

1. My mother taught me to APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me about RELIGION.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me about LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me about FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

6. My mother taught me about IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

7. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

8. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks like a tornado went through it."

9. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

10. My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

11. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

12. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

13. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

14. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

15. My mother taught me about MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

16. My mother taught me about ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you'll be cold?"

17. My mother taught me about HUMOR.
"When that lawnmower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

18. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

19. My mother taught me about GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

20. My mother taught me about WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand.

21. My mother taught me about SHARING.
" I’m going to give you a piece of my mind!"

22. My mother taught me about FEAR.
"One day you'll have a child who'll do the same things to you."

(updated: from an email)

Happy Mother's Day, friends!

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

I've been absent for so long I don't know where to begin. I guess I'll start with ME... my favorite subject ;)

As you know the surgery has yet to be successful. (I'm still hopeful!) My head continues to feel like boiling water. The burning and sharp pain comes and goes in my left ear. I have shooting pains throughout my head several times a day.

The doctor put me on Lyrica last Friday. Finally! 25 days after surgery (at the time) and calls to the doctor reporting increasing symptoms. Ugh! I hate arrogant neurosurgeons!!!!

So I've been taking Lyrica three times a day now for five days. A few days ago I noticed a slight difference, but the past few days it's been rainy. Rain (or just the "threat" of rain) causes so much pain that I haven't been able to notice any change with the other symptoms. I'm still hopeful this medicine will take care of the pain. Let us pray.

I leave you with
this! :)

Friday, May 05, 2006

Friday Funny... Nurse Appreciation Style!

(I haven't been feeling well. The pain's still pretty intense with no signs of relief. I'll try to post and visit you later. To my fellow nurses... Happy (early) Nurses Day!)

Three old ornery grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home.

An old grandpa walked by, and one of the old grandmas yelled out saying, "We bet we can tell how old you are."

The old man said, "There ain't no way you can guess it."

One of the ornery grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your under shorts and we can tell your exact age."

So embarrassed just a little, he dropped his drawers. The grandmas stared at him for a while, asked him to turn around a couple of times, asked him to jump up and down for a little while and then they all piped up and said, "You're 84 years old!"

The old man was stunned. "Amazing! How in the world did you guess that?"

The ornery old grandmas, laughed. Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, all three happily yelled in unison,

"Because you told us yesterday"


A male patient is lying in bed in hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult, four hour, surgical procedure.

A young student nurse arrives, to give him a partial sponge bath.

"Nurse", he mumbles, from behind the mask. "Are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know sir, I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around.
Then, she takes a close look and says,"There's nothing wrong with them sir."

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen very, very closely...
A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k?"


A big shot attorney had to spend a couple of days in the hospital. He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossed them around just like he did his staff. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to do with him. The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him.

She came into his room and announced, "I have to take your temperature."

After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled down, crossed his arms and opened his mouth. "No, I'm sorry," the nurse stated, "but for this reading, I can't use
an oral thermometer."

This started another round of complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared his behind.

After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce, "I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!"

She leaves the door to his room open on her way out! He curses under his breath as he hears people walking past his door laughing.

After a half hour, the man's doctor comes into the room. "What's going on here?" asked the doctor.

Angrily, the man answers, "What's the matter, Doc? Haven't you ever seen someone having
their temperature taken?"

After a pause, the doctor confesses, "Not with a carnation".

(Note: Never Tick Off a Nurse!)