Monday, July 24, 2006

The swelling is down. The pain and numbness is improving in my hands and feet. I can feel your prayers and feel comforted by your many loving thoughts.

I'm still experiencing confusion. I'm finding items in wrong... and weird places. Today I opened the drawer to get a spoon and found grocery bags. The other day I asked Jacob why sheets were covering the couch. He looked at me like I was crazy. (We covered the couch after Snicker's bath... new couch!)

Jacob hasn't been here since Friday afternoon. He's been with my parents and today he is at a friend's house. I miss him. I hate being alone most of the time, but especially when things are wacky... when I'm wacky. My mind goes to places I don't want it to go. And I can't bear to think about leaving Jacob. Or him caring the cross of loss the rest of his life.

Tomorrow I see my neurosurgeon. If he doesn't sit down and listen to me do you think I could get away with punching him? Could "brain problems" get me off without charges? Hmm. Bet not since I just typed that. I do believe that's what they call premeditation. Is there such a thing as being charged with premeditated punching? ;)


Blogger PixiePincessMom said...

Hey I'll punch your Dr if you'll come punch mine! I hope your appt tomarrow goes well.

4:00 PM  
Blogger Libragirl said...

I will punch your doctor also.
And you don't even have to punch mine back, I will do it for fun, if it will make him listen

If you can, keep us posted. I'll be thinking of you

5:48 PM  
Blogger Shelli said...

God, that cracked me up! Premeditated punching.

They are going to get things figured out and you are going to be with Jacob for a long time. He will graduate high school, college, get married and have kids of his own and you will see it all. I mean it. Don't think like that.

Hugs and I am with Libragirl, I will punch your doctor also. Tell him to stop being so egotistical and listen to you.

6:03 PM  
Blogger It's a FLIP-FLOP World said...

Well, Kimmy, now we have a whole GANG that will come and punch out that doctor guy of yours!! You take care and just take ONE DAY AT A TIME!! Please try not to think that way...Jacob will have a mother to see him through his life. It is going to be YOU!! Keep us all updated as best you can...Sandy

7:18 PM  
Blogger ...jus me said...

Hang in there girlfriend! Think Sandy had the right idea...we'll all get him if he doesn't be nice to you and listen!

11:50 PM  
Blogger Chana said...

swelling down is good...punching not so good...hope that a little miracle happens and that silly doctor is inspired to be a doctor, a good one...i hope it goes very well...

sorry you miss your baby..he is such a joy in your life and a huge part of it, of course you miss him.

let us know how it goods. good luck. love you.

12:54 AM  
Blogger *~Tey~* said...

Premeditated punching. lol! I'm sure you can't get into any stife with that. But I hope you will keep us posted. God bless you!

1:49 AM  
Blogger Virenda said...

Your scaring me sweetheart. I've been so preoccupied with my own crap that I haven't been visiting my blogs and now I see this.

Please, please take care of yourself. I'm so sorry you and Jacob can't be with each other. I know it's weird but I think (from what you've said) that Jacob is a spectacular little (big) boy, that my heart really aches for him.

Hey it doesn't count IF I PUNCH him...

7:39 PM  

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